This handwriting is from notes between my brother and I almost 17 years ago. Before texting and twitter and facebook, before cell phones, for goodness sake. People wrote each other notes.
I’ve saved these seemingly innocuous notes because 3 days later he was gone. He was having surgery the next day, hence the “see you when you wake up.” He died three days later.
I have a random assortment of my brother’s things. The handwriting is special for some reason that I can’t quite explain.
As I was going through my memory box the pictures of him we’re making me so sad. Partly because I just miss him. Partly because I also realize I am starting to forget him. Forget what he looks like. I find myself looking at the pictures skeptically.
I don’t have the same reaction to his handwriting. I have cards and some of his journals and they comfort me. The scratches of ink on paper soothe me. Maybe because it’s a not so jarring reminder of his absence, rather a soft affirmation of his existence at all.
I thought I could keep up this February photo a day challenge. How hard could it be? Well pretty hard it turns out. For me anyway.
I’ve got three pics to post.
Day 15 – phone. I never thought I would be the kind of person who could NOT be without her phone. Turns out I am. It is a fixture in my back pocket. What’s that you say? I know, I know I still have a 3GS. I’m waiting for the 5 okay. Oh, you said nice ass? Thank you (blushing).
Day 16 – something new
The kids went to Disney on Ice last night. Nana bought them these. Their heads nearly exploded.
Day 17 – time
I went with the passage of time. Seriously, how did he get that big?
FEBPhotoaday goes on even though I’ve had (and continue to have – I feel it coming on again right now) a giant headache.
The prompt for Day #10 is self portrait. There are not too many times during the day that I am by myself. So I realize this is supposed to be a self portrait and I know you can see there are other people in my photo.
But right now, at this moment in my life, THIS is how I see myself.
(They’re ALWAYS with me…help.)